Today I want to share with you a way to bring more ease and peace to your body and mind. I’m going to share a real life story (pretty embarrassing for me!) of how this actually works, and then give you ways you can use it starting today to build your Powerful Presence.
You can bring more ease and peace to your body through a practice of letting go.
Many times, our anxiety mounts when we are holding too much tension in our bodies. This can also happen when you are going over an upsetting conversation over and over again in your mind. There is an accumulation within your being, and all that energy has nowhere to go. Perhaps you feel your breath getting tight, or notice your stomach contracting, or feel a pinch in your shoulders.
Your body is talking to you. There’s too much going on.
At this moment of contraction, you don’t feel relaxed, and most likely, you feel overwhelmed and frustrated. Which I imagine you don’t want to feel!
This is the place to let go. When the tension has mounted, your being is asking for relief. It’s actually sending you a strong signal to say, “we need release!” Having a practice of letting go an be a lifesaver when you have an important event, a big talk or performance, or an vital conversation you want to have with a loved one. A practice of letting go allows the steam to escape, so you don’t say something you regret or act out of your fear or anger. Letting go allows you to come back into your body and heart and be in your power, one that will create the impact you desire and strengthen the important relationships in your life.
I know over the years I have been very vulnerable with you, and today will be no different:) Here is my personal and embarrassing example of how this actually works and how radical the transformation can be when you let go.
Historically, I experience lingering coughs with my colds. They last weeks and sometimes months. This last cold was better, but the hacking lingered. And I found myself experiencing something I had never dealt with before…I found myself peeing. When my cough was really intense, it was more understandable, but I found it still occurring and was mortified. While out on a walk, a coughing fit overtook me, and I found my leg wet. I was so confused! I practice Qi Gong every day and work my pelvic floor. Why was this happening?
So, I went to my dear friend who is a pelvic floor Physical Therapist and shared what was happening. She asked how long the cough had been going on, and I shared it had been six weeks. She then asked, “do you know how to release your pelvic floor?”
I answered I did, and then she said, “sometimes when we are holding on so tight, there’s nothing left when the muscles actually need to work.”
As soon as she said this, I knew that was it. I realized I’ve been unconsciously holding my pelvic floor in, and I wasn’t even sure for how long. After our conversation, I would just take a moment and check in with my pelvic floor, and every time, it was tense. So I would practice letting go. Over and over.
And my leg remained dry, and has ever since.
I thought I needed to strengthen and grip more tightly, but I actually needed to let go. The muscles of my pelvic floor then had a BREAK. They could relax, so that when a cough DID come, they could do their job at that time.
My muscles had gone into high alert, because I had a cough that lasted for so long. The tense muscles had become a protection, but ultimately couldn’t keep it up. They needed a break.
As do we all.
We are in a time of constant news, information, and events that are deeply disturbing. It’s been a barrage and doesn’t seem to be letting up anytime soon, so it would be perfectly understandable if your body and system has put up inner protections to combat the onslaught. And because we are in this time, it is so important that you have practices that actually SUPPORT your well being, and affirm your life.
That is what a practice of letting go does. It allows for ALL of you to be expressed. The yin and the yang, the dark and the light, the tension and the release. These are actual cycles, just like your inhale and exhale. We are not robots, we are human beings, and we need a practice that allows for some equanimity in the face of conflict and adversity.
And the truth is, that a practice of letting go actually puts you in your power. It’s bringing you back to recognizing you have the ability to change, no matter how high the stakes. You don’t have to push, and you don’t have to be on constant high alert. You can transform the tension in your being, in your mind, and step forward with courage.
Some ways you can incorporate a practice of letting go may be taking a breath break in your work day. You can step away from the tension of your screen, your constant emails and messages, and just place your hand on your belly or heart and breathe deeply three times.
You can also do a body scan, and notice where you feel tension. Send breath to that place, and if there is a muscle involved, allow it to relax.
Experiment with letting go by not engaging in a heated conversation with a colleague or loved one. There be a mounting tension of conflict, and you can let go of that and take a walk instead before revisiting the conversation.
One of the most powerful letting go practices I ever did was in the face of my divorce when I had waves of shock going through me multiple times of the day. I couldn’t believe this was my life and I was losing everything. My heart would become so tight and tense, and I used to go to a quiet space and just say, “yes”. By acknowledging the pain and discomfort, I would always feel it loosen.
With any practice you create for letting go, it’s vital that you are turning TOWARDS what is happening in your body and mind. This is not about disassociation or bypassing, because when you do that, it will only return and usually with much more strength. Coming back to my first example, it was turning towards my embarrassing experience that allowed me to tune in and realize I was holding on too tight.
And as you turn towards your tension, bring compassion. Things have been intense. This is understandable, and bringing awareness is the first step to change.
Which you are capable of.
You are actually a magical being of transformation. This is your birthright.
So, bring peace and ease to your body through a practice of letting go, and feel the sweet release. Exhale and rest.